Do I Really Need therapy?
You may be asking yourself this question right now. Perhaps it was on your mind before you started looking into therapy. It’s a common and very reasonable question.
If you’re trying to answer it, the first question to ask yourself might be: why am I asking it?
It might be because you don’t think that what you want to talk about in therapy merits talking about. Maybe you see other people with ‘worse’ problems. It is always possible to find people who look like they’re facing harder things than you. That shouldn’t affect your decision. The key issue is how your life issues are affecting you. If they are destabilising you, affecting your mood or causing you anxiety, low mood, stress or a multitude of other emotional and health consequences, then therapy is there for you.
Perhaps you are asking the question because you’ve coped with your experiences up to now. Some days are bad, some days not so good, some are actually ok; quite often they’re ‘copable.’ We all develop ways to ‘survive’, to manage the impact of our experiences. But perhaps life is about more than merely ‘coping,’ of surviving. Perhaps you’re ready to embrace a different way.
I know from my own experience of starting therapy that it can feel frightening or scary to make that step. Wondering if therapy is right for you can be a natural response to that feeling. I am glad I made that step, because it was a step that put me at the heart of it - that valued what I need and want.
The question may also be about whether it is the right time for you to start therapy. Therapy is a commitment, a process of exploration. A good therapist will help you stay safe, will be alongside you on the process. But it can still be difficult.
If you’re not sure about this, most therapists - me included - offer a free, introductory, informal chat where you can explore it. Your therapist will help you develop a sense of whether you are ready to start. It’s also worth remembering that therapy is not a bus you cannot get off - while it is always good to commit once you’ve made the step, you’re free to step off any time.
Therapy is for everyone who is struggling in whatever way. There is no hierarchy of struggle. It is purely about how your life and your experience is affecting you.
To answer the question ‘do I need therapy?’ here’s my take: if you are struggling and it is affecting your life, your emotions or your health, therapy is there to help.
If you’re grappling with this question, you’ve made the first step by reading this. If it’s not the right time for you, I wish you well. If it is, you can contact me or use the various directories from BACP, NCPS, Counselling Directory and Psychology Today to reach out to a counsellor. Whatever you choose to do will be the right choice for you, right now.